Category Archives: Health

Part of the self-reliance Foundation dealing with your physical well-being.

And I’m back. Almost.

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It’s been a while. I issued a pre-emptive mea culpa a while back in anticipation of some surgery I had coming up and suggested I might not be posting until it was all in the rear-view mirror. Well, it’s all nearly in the rear view mirror now, and I’m trying to gear up to come back.

So, what have I learned over the past couple months? Well, for one, to quote Count Rugen from “The Princess Bride,” “If you haven’t got your health, then you haven’t got anything.” Knowing for the past couple years that this surgery was possible I’ve made a conscious effort to exercise more, eat a little less, and generally be in better health. I’m fortunate in that my health has never been that bad to begin with, but good health with really helps when facing major surgery. The average hospital stay in my state for the type of surgery I had is six days. I was there four. It may be that I was just so ornery they wanted to get rid of me, but I’ll claim a victory for exercise and eating right.

But even then, once out of the hospital I was under significant restrictions on my physical activity. I wasn’t allowed to drive (not a big deal right now, as I seldom go anywhere anyway), lift anything over ten pounds, and had to avoid reaching very far from my body. Just those few restrictions were frustrating. It’s amazing how much of my normal activity violates at least one of those last two restrictions. I’m fortunate enough to have a desk job that I was already doing from home, so I could get back to work only a week after returning home, but so many other things I wanted to do, or felt I should do just weren’t allowed. I’ll admit I’ve felt pretty useless.

So I can only imagine what it’s like to be someone whose health in general places restrictions on their activity. Value what health you have, and do what you can to maintain it, even improve it. It’s difficult to be self-reliant without good health.

On a similar note, I’ve learned that monitoring your health is important, too, for other reasons. Because I’ve known this was coming I was able to be prepared. As a contractor, I’m on a high-deductible insurance plan. But since I knew this surgery was coming I’ve spent the past couple years saving up enough to cover it.

By contrast, during my recovery period my son crashed while mountain biking and ended up in the emergency room. Frankly, that’s something I should have predicted and tried to save up more money for, but I didn’t. I wasn’t quite so prepared for that one. But thanks to this gentle reminder (which could have been much worse), I intend to be next time (knock on wood, spit three times over my shoulder).

Lesson three was the gentle reminder that sometimes we just can’t be self-reliant. I’m grateful for the wonderful medical staff who took such good care of me. I forgive you for waking me up every two hours; it was your job to make sure nothing was going wrong. Aside from than that, you guys totally rocked! Thank you! And thanks to my wife and my two boys at home who picked up the slack for all I couldn’t do. And also for all those who offered their help. As grateful as I am there wasn’t much my family couldn’t handle, I’m glad to have more family and friends gladly standing by to help.

This week I’m scheduled to see my surgeon. If all has gone well, my restrictions will be removed and I can start getting back to normal. I’ll still have to take some things easy and work my way back, but I’ll get there. One of the first things I need to do is get back on track with our self-reliance plans. And hopefully that means more posts in the works.

Unfocused and missing in action

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Speaking of Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs, I recently received a Need up-side the head. You’d think that fifteen-plus years of monitoring a pending health problem would make it difficult for it to surprise you, but… surprise! It’s time to deal with it in a surgical way.

I guess the one advantage to this being something always hanging out there on the horizon is that we’re financially prepared for this. That part shouldn’t be an issue. It’s just the actual surgery part that I’m struggling with. The risk is low at my age and general health, low enough that most people would gladly take that bet, especially if the stakes were lower.

In any case, I’ve not been thinking self-reliance much lately, and probably won’t be again until this is all in the rear-view mirror. Though much of what I’m currently working on is self-reliance centered, or should be, I’m not interested in talking about it yet. I’m sure that will come. I may post some, I may not, but for the next month at least it’s probably safe to assume there’ll be no more content forthcoming. Unless there’s someone else out there who would like to guest post for a while.

Until then, see you all on the flip-side!

Living in interesting times

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There is a curse of uncertain origin: “May you live in interesting times.” Well, it would appear we are cursed. Within the space of a few months we’ve experienced a pandemic with its accompanying challenges, Asian murder hornets, and now civil unrest and riots. And through it all we’ve experienced a constant social media barrage as seemingly everyone feels qualified and obligated to tell us what to do, what to think, and what to feel.

It’s difficult to not just turn off the light and go back to bed, to say nothing of meeting each day with a smile. There’s few things more annoying to me when I’m already stressed than to have everyone lecturing one another and looking to find fault. I prefer to make social media my “happy place,” but lately it’s been anything but.

The things is, my life isn’t that bad. Working from home isn’t as difficult as I’d feared. I’m still getting paid. I’ve got most of my family around me, and my distant daughter is safe. My wife and son kept their jobs throughout all this. We’ve been able to hold church at home. I don’t really care that much about going places–at least places that would now be off limits. Our house is comfortable, our yard is perking up nicely, and I have plenty of cute, furry things to pet when I need a little fur-therapy.

But even with all that some days it’s just been almost too much to bear. Even without everything going on right now life can still hit you hard on an off day. Now, there are people who deal with anxiety and depression, and I by no means imply they should be able to just snap out of it, or that anything I’m about to suggest should work for them. But for the rest of us, here are a few things I’ve found helps me cope.

Exercise – I realized at one point amid my home isolation I had let my exercise program slide. Even when I was doing it I wasn’t doing it for very long. So I changed things up, getting up a little earlier to make sure I was getting longer, regular activity. I also took advantage of my being home and my shared interest with my younger son to get outside every other afternoon for some basketball. Pretty soon I noticed two improvements. I was feeling better physically from improved health, and following through on my goal was boosting my general satisfaction with myself.

To Do Lists – This probably won’t work for everyone, but in my case the less I feel I accomplish the worse I feel about myself. I actually don’t like to-do lists, but I do like the feeling I get when I check off an item or when I review my accomplishments at the end of the week. The thing that surprised me was to find that the size of the task doesn’t matter so much. If it’s something you need to remember to do, put it on there–in fact, the smaller they are, the easier it is to do them, so if you have something big that can be broken down into smaller tasks (ie. getting stuff you need, prep-work, the actual job, cleanup, etc.), do it! You’ll have concrete proof of having done something, and it really helps.

Ditch the Downers – I have a love-hate relationship with social media. When the majority of my feed is positive I feel positive. But the more negativity that creeps in the more I feel myself absorbing it. And I hate unfriending people–my problem, I know. But recently I discovered that Facebook gives you the ability to “snooze” people for 30 days rather than unfriending or hiding them. I find it much easier to hit the “smite” button and say, “I don’t want to deal with you right now.” There may be other ways, including taking a break altogether. If you’re like me and you can’t help absorbing the negative energy, it’s okay to admit you just can’t handle it. You shouldn’t have to handle it. Most people wouldn’t come over to your house to act like that, so it’s okay to avoid them online if necessary. Take a break.

It’s Okay – Related to the previous point, I can really get on myself sometimes. I keep telling myself I have no reason to be feeling the way I feel, that other people don’t feel this way, and that I should just snap out it and move on. Sometimes I can do it, but sometimes I just can’t. And I’m slowly coming to realize that’s okay! It’s okay to feel what I’m feeling. It might be good to look more closely and see what might be behind it, but ultimately…it’s okay. Also, cut other people some slack. We all deal with things differently, and things that bother me won’t necessarily bother you–and vice versa. If I’m dealing with something, chances are you’re dealing with something too. It’s okay if you don’t handle it the way I would. I don’t need to be like you in how you handle things. People get angry, get stressed, get hard to live with. Let them. Give them some distance if you can’t handle it yourself, but don’t beat yourself up over it. Own how you feel and make a plan to move forward.

Pull a Scarlet O’Hara – Years ago when I was out of work for two years I would have the occasional meltdown. My poor wife couldn’t talk any sense into me, and I most certainly couldn’t talk myself out of it. I’d get caught in circular thinking and go down in flames. Eventually I started learning that some days I’d just have to surrender and go to bed early. Almost without fail things would look better the next day. A good night’s sleep can act as a reset button, clearing out the mental garbage you couldn’t get rid of the day before. Sometimes I’ve even found the admission that I just can’t handle it to be cleansing enough to turn things around.

Get Outside – During this pandemic that option hasn’t been available to everyone, but even just getting out for a while to walk the dog can be great. A change of scenery works wonders sometimes.

Well, that’s the extent of my wisdom. Just remember, free advice is worth every penny you pay for it! But hopefully something in here may just help. Everyone struggles from time to time. We’ll get through it sooner or later, but every little tool, every strategy helps.

What are some of your favorite coping strategies? Leave a comment!

Take good care of yourself, you belong to…you!

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I went to post a link to yesterday’s column on Facebook and suddenly realized I’d gotten sidetracked when I wrote it. The post title had nothing to do with what I ended up writing about! So here I am, back again, hoping to get it right this time!

As I began yesterday, the article “7 Tips For Increasing Self-Reliance” lists some of the usual things and some less-than-usual. One that perhaps doesn’t get the attention it deserves is their point on looking after your body:

While you shouldn’t expect yourself to be your own doctor and should always seek medical advice if you are concerned about your health, try to look after your body to minimize the need for treatment and medication.

While you shouldn’t expect yourself to be your own doctor and should always seek medical advice if you are concerned about your health, try to look after your body to minimize the need for treatment and medication.

Work out on a regular basis and eat healthy food most of the time. Try to stay informed about specific diseases that you may be at risk of developing (whether genetic or environmental reasons). All of these actions will make you more confident about relying on your body. It will have the side-effect of making you feel more comfortable with the idea of self-reliance in general.

I’ve always taken my health for granted. Somehow I bucked the family genetic trend and was born with a high metabolism, I’ve been on the skinny side most of my life. While never all that physically active, I was certainly more so than most teens today. And in college I was in great shape; slinging a vacuum around a department store for four hours every morning, followed by frequent, high speed walks back and forth from upper campus to lower. I never considered my body; it always did what I needed it to do.

Then I graduated and got a desk job. And I got married. In a short amount of time I put on thirty pounds. My doctor got on my case about that, and with little modification I took those pounds back off. Then I found that fat had been masking something else. I had a heart murmur. We quickly discovered I have two leaky heart valves. Fortunately, it was nothing serious yet, so we continued to monitor it. My lifestyle still didn’t change much.

When we moved to Utah I didn’t even continue monitoring it for a while. And when I finally did, things seemed normal. Then suddenly, one year, they weren’t. My heart is getting worse. Though getting in better shape can’t fix that, the doctor agreed it certainly wouldn’t hurt. So I’ve been making a more concerted effort to get in better shape.

Mind you, I still find exercise an inconvenience. There are other things I’d much rather do than spend an hour a day (on average) exercising. But I will grudgingly admit to noticing a difference when I do. I’m not as tired. I don’t give out as quickly. I can pretty much do whatever I need to do around the house

Part of the trick for me is to either find something I enjoy doing, or find ways to make what I’m doing enjoyable. I ride a stationary bike every morning for 25-30 minutes. I listen to speakers or audio books during that time so that I pay less attention to the clock. Every other day I practice basketball, either playing with my son or working on my shot on my own. Since my objective is completely separate from the exercise I don’t focus on the fact that I’m exercising.

I’ll never been one of those guys who measures his exercise in miles our hours. Spending six hours on a Saturday biking 50 miles just doesn’t sound fun to me. For me the primary motivation comes down to this: I’ve got a heart condition that could significantly limit my life span. My best chance of beating that is by being as healthy as I can. Life is only getting more interesting the older I get. I don’t want to miss anything.

COVID Confusion

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I found this in our local monthly/marketing newspaper in a humor piece of things the author learned from social media during the COVID-19 quarantine:

In effort not to get sick we should eat well, but we should not go out to get healthy fresh food when we run out and eat whatever pre-packaged food we have on hand instead. However, we should order out at our local restaurants to help keep them in business. Then it’s okay to go out to pick up the food. Your food might be prepared by someone sick that doesn’t know they are sick, but that’s okay if you pay by credit card and take the food out of the container. However, you should avoid going to the grocery store at all costs because you might get sick.

Joani Taylor, “The Social Media Scandal – What I Learned During Quarantine”, Sandy City Journal

If there is anyone left out there who still believes there’s a perfect response to a pandemic, especially one where the details about the virus aren’t really known…well, they’re probably on social media telling the rest of us what we should be doing. I’ve been fortunate enough to live in a state that took a somewhat moderate approach, while managing to keep the death rate fairly low, but the nags and scolds have been everywhere all the same.

Sure, I get it. People are scared, and fear makes people thrash about desperately in search of some way to feel in control. For many people that means lecturing everyone else. But the rest of us, when faced with conflicting information, reach a point where we just have to decide for ourselves which advice we can keep and what risks we are willing to take. Here are a few of the things I’ve learned (or re-learned) from all of this:

  • Preparation buys time. We were not as prepared as we wish we’d been, but we still had at least several weeks worth of all essential items. Even though we weren’t sure how long our toilet paper supply would last, we had enough to hang in there until more started appearing. We didn’t need to panic, spend exorbitant amounts of money to secure the essentials, and could put off even shopping for groceries until things calmed down.
  • People don’t want or can’t handle fresh. When we did go shopping we had no trouble finding fresh fruits and vegetables. Do people just not buy the more perishable items in an emergency? It’s not like we were without power. Veggies keep for weeks in the fridge. Or do people just not know how to prepare fruits and vegetables anymore? Not that I’m complaining. We’ve been able to eat healthy while everyone else, from the look of the store shelves, are existing on flour, pasta and beans.
  • Savings are essential. I am one of the fortunate people who can work from home, even if it’s not my preferred way to work. But even I had been furloughed or laid off we would have had savings to get through this.
  • Flexibility and resilience help. When things like this happen we can sit back and complain over every inconvenience or difficulty, or we can relax, take a deep breath (or two or three), and deal with everything one step at a time. This is easier to do if you’re not worried about basic survival.
  • Cut everyone some slack, including yourself. I’ve had to continually remind myself that people are experiencing widely varying levels of stress right now. On the other hand, if there were people whose stress was causing me stress, I’m not obligated to keep absorbing their stress. There are some where I hit the “social media snooze button” so I wouldn’t have to deal with them until things calm down again. For the most part people have been keeping things on an even keel, and when they aren’t I would try to be kind and remember where they’re coming from.
  • Even introverts need people. While introverts across the world have been cheering about this being the moment they were born for, the truth is, introversion does not mean we don’t need anyone else. Introversion/Extroversion is more a matter of where we get our energy from. Extroverts get their energy from being with others. Introverts get theirs from being somewhat isolated and quiet. We can enjoy social interactions, and even get some energy from particularly enjoyable ones, but most drain energy from us, and sooner or later we need to get away and recharge. Being shut up at home hasn’t been particularly difficult for me, but after a couple weeks I found myself reaching out to people much more than I usually do. I miss the depth, breadth and variety of my normal interactions.
  • Focus on what you can do. This crisis quickly revealed where our family is not as prepared as we should be. The problem is that some of that just can’t–and perhaps shouldn’t–be fixed right now. We found we were least prepared in our supplies of paper products, baking supplies, and a few other food categories. And yet if we’ve learned anything about shortages, it’s that running out and stocking up just make things worse for everyone, so we’ve had to resist that urge. Instead, we identified some things we can procure right now, and we’ve focused on that. We have a much better water storage now, and we’re better prepared for the next power outage (and in our area, there will be one). I feel satisfaction and accomplishment at having done something useful, even if I can’t solve all of the problem just yet.
  • Have a plan for the rest. As I said above, there are some preparedness deficiencies we can’t fix yet. But I’ve learned from sad experience that if I don’t have a plan in place for when we get back to normal-enough I’ll likely forget to do anything at all. I can take this time now to at least come up with a plan so that I know the next steps to take once we can take them.
  • It’s difficult to be prepared for everything. I’ve been a homeowner for over twenty years. In this part of the world we have to be on guard against mice. Right before our state went into quarantine we discovered something entirely new: rats. Mice we could have dealt with. Nothing we had worked on rats. And even after some online research and a curbside pickup purchase it took a long time to figure out what would work.

I could probably go on, but I’m hearing too many heads hitting keyboards already, so I’l spare you. This quarantine experience has certainly given us a lot to think about, and a lot of time in which to think about it. Right now the biggest question we should all ask is, “What do I do about it?” What are we going to change as a result of our experiences? Set a goal, make a plan, and get it done.

Dealing with stress

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My brother has an excellent post on his site about dealing with stress:

“If I hold it for an hour, I’ll have an ache in my right arm. If I hold it for a day, you’ll have to call an ambulance. In each case it’s the same weight, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes.” She continued, “and that’s the way it is with stress. If we carry our burdens all the time, sooner or later, as the burden becomes increasingly heavy, we won’t be able to carry on.”

I know I don’t deal with stress very well. I let things build until eventually it has to be released–and far too often not in very productive ways. That usually just adds to my stress, of course, because then I also have to patch up damaged relationships as well.

Ideally I will take some time to identify my primary stressor, and then deal with it. Often it’s some particular task or conversation that I’m avoiding. If I just push forward and get it over with I’m usually much happier. Unfortunately I need more practice at that.

How do you deal with stress? Drop a comment below, and then head over to my brother’s site and adds to the discussion there as well!

Emergency dental care

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Does your dentist always send you home with a free toothbrush, a sample tube of toothpaste, and a sample spool of dental floss after each checkup like mine? What do you do with them? If you’re just throwing them away, make I recommend you put them into your emergency evacuation (72-hour) kit? If you ever need to evacuate for a time you’ll have brand new items, usually with more than enough of each to get you through the crisis. And it’s free (sort of)!

Take care of yourself

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Self Reliance Exchange has a short article about taking care of our health. As I said, it’s short, so I’ll reprint much of it here:

…are you:

  • Getting enough sleep?
  • Exercising regularly?
  • Eating right?
  • Protecting yourself?
  • Taking your medications?
  • Seeing your doctor and dentist?

While I don’t live up to my own standards, I do believe in this. Life is stressful enough without making it more difficult by not taking care of yourself. Inversely, I deal with stress much better when I’m getting enough sleep and getting some good, solid exercise.

It’s tempting when things get tough or tight to skimp on yourself. Don’t! You can only overload yourself for so long before you give out and are no good to anyone. Take care of yourself!

On marketing, consumerism, and self-reliance

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Rhonda Hetzel at Down To Earth Forum has an interesting essay examining the idea that unwarranted concern over food safety has made us all dependent on pre-packaged foods. I think there is something to that.

For one thing, marketing has long focused on showing how a product fills your needs, and they’re not above creating a need where there is none, even if it means scaring you to death. I remember a friend of mine years ago trying to sell me on a vitamin program based on this apocalyptic presentation that did its best to convince us that we would all die terrible, awful deaths without their vitamins. I didn’t buy it, or the vitamins.

For another, though it may have gotten its start in marketing, the anti-germ crusade has taken on a life of its own. We are so concerned about germs that we are using stronger and stronger products whose only real effect is to force-evolve more potent germs while simultaneously weakening our own natural defenses.

Now, I’m not an un-hygenic person, but I often observed at work how many people would take their paper towel they had just dried their hands on and use it to open the door out of the restroom so they wouldn’t have to expose themselves to the germs on the door handle. I don’t know if this helped them any, but I suspect all it did was make the door handle moist, thus extending the life expectancy of any germs that were there. In any case, I didn’t do that, and I was, if not sick less often, not sick any more frequently than they were.

At the same company we had executives who would spend months at a time at our India office, living amid conditions that would make most of us shudder. Invariably they would all get terribly sick within a few weeks of arriving there. Yet they all observed that the Indians themselves were very seldom sick–and they (the executives) seldom got sick again.

Now I’m not recommending we all start living in squalor or abandon basic hygiene in order to start building up immunity to common germs, but I do think we could relax a bit and not insist on surgical-theater cleanliness for every room in our house.

What are your thoughts?

 

In case you were wondering

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My yearly checkup with my cardiologist went fine. Taking echo-cardiograms is becoming second-nature to me now, though I’m regularly impressed how the technician can look at the odd stuff on the screen and know what they are looking at. And as the assistant was hooking me up for an EKG I suddenly pictured myself as a cow being hooked up to a milking machine.

Anyway, the bottom line is that nothing has changed significantly since last year. And that’s good. The longer my situation remains unchanged the better. It means major surgery is not in my immediate future, and if I can hold it off long enough technology may advance sufficiently to where it will no longer require major surgery. I’m all for that. Better a nanobot injection in twenty years than valve replacement today.

So what does this have to do with self-reliance? Well, you can’t be entirely self-reliant without your health. The more you know about your health the more you can do about it. The earlier you detect problems the sooner you can deal with them–preferably by yourself and not with significant medical intervention. I’ve nothing against medical intervention, but if you can do something to keep from needing it, why not do it? Being proactive in your health allows you the most control over your medical future.

In my case it’s a reassurance to know that I’m still okay. It’s also reassurance that my current level of preventive action is sufficient. I don’t have to guess what I need to be doing. I’m doing it, and it’s working. That in itself is peace of mind.